In life, there are those rare occassions when you willfully lose something. You let it fly right out of your hands, knowing pretty well you will repent it. Knowing that one day you will ask yourself how could you ever let it happen. How did things turn this way?
Knowing that there will be no return.
And then there are things you do. Things you deliberately create. Deliberately say. Scheme! Everything with the hope that it will turn out alright. With that hope. A flimsy thread of faith. Just a breathful.
I have been here before.